SAFETY FIRST
I used to daydream about my futuristic bedroom I’d have when I was older. I’d have a skate board ramp, TVs everywhere, a trampoline and so on and so forth. During class, I’d doodle aforementioned room and imagine what an awesome time my friends would have hanging in my room. I mean I was already making all of my neighbors come to my house every day after school to record us signing Vanilla Ice so why not turn this mutha up a notch.
In 3rd grade Mrs. Mizer tasked us with planning out our fire escapes in our house. I was all over this project. My 1st attempt looked a little like the game mouse trap which I believe ended with a catapult for my family and Maggie, my 3 legged dog. After some thought and guided direction I came to the conclusion this might not be the best plan of escape. I lick the tip of my No. 2 pencil and go back to the drawing board.
Now like any good plan, you need to make sure it works. I ring up my best bud since I was 1 year old (we are a day apart in age) and have her come over to my house to assist. It must be mentioned Amy is a bit of a whee tot. Still to this day. Technically I think she might fall in “little person” territory since she has not surpassed the 5ft mark yet. So, you can imagine her length. It’s important.
My mom gets a call from a neighbor, “Do you know what Katie is doing right now?” Ole Marilyn got a lot of these calls and unfortunately an answer was not readily available a majority of the time. The neighbor takes a deep breath and goes, “well, it seems that Katie is dangling Amy Doss by her arms from the roof!!”
You see, my plan involved crawling out of my window, going thru the banister of our 2nd story balcony and climbing onto the lower portion of the roof that hung over the 1st story of our house. Then you’d scooch your root to the edge of the roof, turn around, dangle and JUMP! We’ll since Amy was so short I had to dangle her a little bit. She kept complaining that it burnt her knees when she landed on the ground below. In an effort to encourage her to drop I said, “Burnt knees are way better then a burnt face.”